Category Archives: adopted

Say Something

So often we feel like there isn’t anyone listening. Those times where it feels we are crying into a deep vortex of loud noise without our voice being heard. I want to encourage you today there is just a person who believes in you, hears you and knows that you are growing in steps while he walks along with you. He’s been there all along…He’s not giving up on you. He’s running after you…everywhere you have been He’s been there with you. He’s a dad that will never give up on you and have hopes, dreams, and a future full of joy, love and peace.He will never give up on you!

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Scars

 

 

As I drove home from the gym this morning, I began to think about scars. How they look. How they heal. How did it get there in the first place. The Lord began to show me how scars relate to how He transforms our life.

Over 20 years ago I had a surgery that changed my life forever. A doctor made a mistake, which in turn caused me to have a total hysterectomy at age 19. I have a scar from one side to the other on my lower abdomen (along with others in the same area). These aren’t noticeable to others, however they are to me. They are reminder of a deep wound not only physically but emotionally. I don’t dwell on this, I have accepted it as part of my past.

I have experienced great disappointment of never physically being able to have children, and hurt from the trauma caused by the hand of someone I trusted (my doctor). What was an attempt to destroy life, turned into something that forever filled my life with great joy. Had I not had the hysterectomy,  I may have never adopted my 2 daughters. What the enemy meant for bad, God turned into good. The scars of the past, are erased when I see them. They are my absolute joy.

This is how Jesus is when we accept Him into our hearts. The wounds and things of the past are healed. We may have the memories and thoughts which are the scars but we have a future in Him, which heals the broken hearted.  I want to encourage you today that the scars of the past do not determine your future. They may take you in a different direction, BUT God will turn whatever was meant for bad into good.

The scars Jesus has in his side and hands, are the scars that reveal our future. Jesus took the most brutal beating that left him with scars of His past, but oh my goodness the promise of the future. Jesus knew that the wounds He took for us were to give us our destiny, a great future in Him. His scars from the nails in His hands, to the spear in His side are a reminder of Him being raised from the dead and the redemption for His people. Thank you Father that you heal the wounds of our past and have given us the promise of a great future through your only Son.

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The Ripple Effect

Have you ever thought about how touching water makes a ripple? Think about when you throw a stone into the water how it affects all the area around the point of contact. From the start of the first small ripple it grows into a large ripple. You can throw a small stone and make a huge impact with the ripple, I call this the ripple effect.

The ripple effect applies to how we respond and interact with one another. Take the cashier at Wal-Mart for instance. She can be having a horrible day, not friendly to you because of what she is dealing with, and it will effect  your day. The ripple effect will be, you jumping in your car, driving aggressively and get a phone call and respond with an attitude to the caller. We will think how someone could have been so rude, and get offended over something that actually had nothing to do with us. The same is true if you get a phone call that someone wants to bless you with a gift, this will effect  your entire day in a positive way. The ripple effect will be, because of someone’s action it created in you a positive response, which will in turn causes you to be kind to someone else.

This brings me to a story that happened while living in Chicago. Wow, that was a culture shock living in such a large city. Imagine everything you need within walking distance. People packing the streets busy about their day. Cars and their horns blazing. Sirens blaring and the yellow of cabs flashing by as you walk to your destination. Many people make these very streets their home. A place to lay their head and a place where they may find food to eat.

I will never forget the lives I passed daily who lived on the very street I walked to school every day. Do you think the passersby thought about the ripple effect? What about those who pass by and give no thought to the fact that these are lives, not just something to walk by as quick as possible. Ignoring these lives has a ripple effect, it says you are not important enough for me to stop by and say hi.  Muchless ask if they have a need that could be met.

I daily passed by such a person when I would walk off of the “L” train.  She would stand in the same place everyday not bothering anyone. She had a shopping cart with her full of things that we would throw away. On the cart were plastic bags tied to the side, of what I would assume were items she didn’t want to get wet. She has such a sweet presence about her. Everyday she would be singing and humming with such a joyful heart. She didn’t know that she was having a ripple effect on me.

As I made it home each day I would have her on my heart. God began to really speak to me about her . I felt in my heart I needed to reach out to her and bring her a hot meal. I really wanted to do something that would really make her happy. As I stepped off of the “L” train I approached her, this was the day to reach out. I said to her I had some chili on the stove and if she would give me 30 minutes I would make cornbread and bring her dinner. She said to me, “oh sweetie thank you so much but if I want to get a bed I have to be on time, thank you.” Oh gosh I felt like I had been gut punched. I knew the Lord had told me to feed her and to reach out. The following day I didn’t even say a word, I ran straight up ( took the elevator) I lived 15 stories up, put some chili in a bowl and ran right back down. She was gone. Oh how my heart hurt, I felt I was missing the Lord on this one.

 The weekend rolls around, I look out my window and I see her in her usual spot. This morning I made bacon, eggs and biscuits. I pack her a nice meal up and take off down the stairs, as you can guess she was gone. At this point I gave up, I thought forget it, I tried. Isn’t it funny how we want to make sure things are “perfect” and “just right”?  Often times God just wants us to make the step and let Him do the rest.One evening I make my way home, I see this joyful spirited women and I say to her,” stay right here, don’t go anywhere I will be right back.” I booked it up to my home, I had zero groceries at the time because I hadn’t had time to shop. I  ran to my closet and found a pair of wool socks and new tennis shoes. I had noticed she had holes in hers. I grabbed saltine crackers and some more “whatever is in the pantry” and I grabbed my Bible, packed it all up in a box and ran down the stairs.She was still there, I was so excited to see her. I said to her, Jesus told me to bring you these and I want to give them to you. She looked at each thing, but much to my amazement was her response to the Bible. She grabbed me, hugged me better than I have ever been hugged before and started singing a worship song. She loved the Lord and could not believe she now had a Bible. She kissed me on the cheek and thanked me over and over. I told her, this was from the Lord. This still brings tears to my eyes today. I left her and never saw her again. She was never there to greet me with her singing as I got off the train. I never saw her pushing her cart around making her way to where she slept in the evenings. To this day I believe she was an angel of the Lord. The Bible says we will entertain angels and not even know.

What I thought was me doing a good deed and doing my best to listen to the Lord, turned into impacting me in a life changing way. She had a ripple effect on my life and I am sure on so many others. Today, this has set me on a course for helping those in need. To see the value in everyone. To take the time to talk with someone and make sure they know they matter. The one pebble of encountering one of the most beautiful people I have had the pleasure of meeting, created a ripple so large that it still reaches others.

As you go about your day, think about the impact you have on someone else. Something as simple as a kind voice tone and attitude can have a ripple effect to help change someone’s day. Next time you are at the check out counter, think about how many people the cashier sees a day and does anyone take the time to just talk and see how they are doing. When you go home to your spouse, take the time to notice one another. This list can go on and on. Jesus made a HUGE ripple when he went to the cross for us that is still making contact with lives every day. Jesus will lead you to someone if we will be open to listen and obey. Make a ripple today.

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You Came To My Rescue

Knowing what it is like to feel unwanted has created in me a desire to make sure others know they are wanted-Oprah

When I heard Oprah say this statement while giving her story of how she overcame her past and has grown into who she is, rang a bell inside my heart.  I have a deep care for those who have been “tossed away” by society, families and life in general. This care has really taken over in my life regarding pets. Oh my, I believe I could take in every unwanted animal and help rescue every abused animal out there. Anyone or thing being mistreated or tossed to the side breaks my heart and I have deep compassion.

As a child my father passed away at the age of 5 years old.  My mother ran off around the age of 4 years old.  You can tell by these 2 sentences what really affected me, the loss of my father first, then abandonment of my mother. This created a deep wound inside my heart, along with insecurities and fear. You don’t really know how deep a traumatic event effects a child until they develop as they age. I grew into someone who wanted to please and be everything to everyone at the cost of myself. I developed a fear of being left, unloved and would break off relationships (create rejection) before I would let others reject me. How unhealthy is it to have that in your heart? VERY!

I grew up where you didn’t talk about this kind of stuff, it just was what it was. I never understood why my dad died, I actually for a while thought he died on purpose, because something was wrong with me. I never knew why my mother ran off, or how to navigate through life having such a deep wound in my heart as a child. I always felt there was something wrong with me. I never really felt it was others, more from a place where I wasn’t good enough for others. I never believed I could make it, that I could make a difference or amount to anything. I felt unwanted, not loved and like I was just simply in the way. This kind of loss and rejection as a child, will set you on a course to a life of destruction if God has not been made the director of your life.  Oh, did I make so many bad decisions. I am so thankful that God has redeemed me and used everything for His Glory and to help others!

Once I cried out to the Lord and He changed my  life, I began to see how valuable I am and the value in others.  God says, we are wonderfully made, we are made in His image and He has a future we have hoped for. The Lord says, that he came for those who need a savior (hello that us you and me), those who have been given up on, who’s lives are a mess. He is our deliverer. He came to heal the broken hearted. He is the Father to the fatherless. We are adopted into Christ. I can go on and on. Isn’t that good news? The Lord wants to make sure they know they are wanted and He created them to have a full and great life. Oprah didn’t come up with that, Jesus did.

What the devil meant for bad God turned to good in my life. I have gone from knowing I wasn’t wanted by my mother and feeling abandoned by both parents; to knowing I have a Father who has set me free from my past. I have been adopted into the family of the Lord, I have a HUGE family now that fellowships around the love of God. I have gone from being rejected to accepted. From feeling unloved to loved. From letting my past decide my future, to letting what Jesus did determine my future.

Growing up with this in my heart has given me a compassion and heart for the really wounded. To help those who do not know they are even seen. To use what had my heart broken, into helping others walk through healing in their hearts through the power of God’s word. Knowing what it is like to feel unwanted has created in me a desire to make sure others know they are wanted and loved. God wants us to know our past doesn’t determine our future, but our future can help others determine theirs. If you have a wounded heart make the decision today to call out to God, and ask Him to fill you with His love. If you have already walked through the healing power of Jesus, reach out to someone who is broken and share of His power in your life. Today could be THE day for you!

 

 

 

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